I stopped to take a break and searched “tasers” on Amazon Smile. I was supposed to be writing, but I often take breaks to follow tangential whims that usually lead to me mentally saying, “Huh” before moving on to the next thing.

I feel young to already live in my dream home. Most people have to wait and save and take mortgages for a couple decades, and yet, here I am, at 27. It turns out it is much less dramatic than all that if your dream home is a studio apartment.